My worries

When my husband worries, that’s when you know it’s a legitimate worry.

I’m genuinely worried about a few developmental milestones and actions that LO does or doesn’t do. For instance, he doesn’t wave “bye” or “hi.” He doesn’t say words, and I mean real words. Yeah, he says “Daddy” but it’s really more like “Daaaa-di-di-di” or “Mama” really sounds like, “Mam ma ma ma.”

He points and claps and has been for a long time, but he did those things later than his peers. For instance, his peers were clapping by 6 months; he didn’t do it until about 9 or 10. Same with pointing; he really just got into this after he turned one.

I also want him to interact with people more, and to smile at people. One of the symptoms of autism is seeing people as equal to objects, or as a means to an end. So if they’re happy that you’re picking up them, great. But if they’re only happy you’re picking them up because you’re taking them to the kitchen or to look outside the window, not so great. So far I haven’t seen LO exhibit the latter, and he definitely shows happiness for the sake of happiness when he sees me. But there are also times when he would rather point out the lights and the plants in the room rather than notice that I just arrived in the room. How exactly do you discourage that? Or how do you make them happy to see you—is there such a way?

One of our play date kids, “N” is a month younger than LO and smiles up a storm whenever he sees LO. LO, on the other hand, doesn’t return the smile. He does smile at N’s mom, but not at N.

I’m normally the worry wart, but now even my husband is worried. We want to see a specialist to get him evaluated, and we’re waiting for the doctor to call us back. I just want to know what actions are correct and which ones we should stop.

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