Working mom vs. stay at home mom

Go back to work or stay at home? This is the conundrum mothers face at the end of maternity leave. I on the other hand, decided to do both. I go in to the office 3 days out of the week and am with my baby the other two.

I considered staying at home with the little guy full time, but taking care of him alone during maternity leave was difficult (granted he was much younger). But I also didn’t want to have the same schedule I had because I wanted him to be with his parents as much as possible. Now I feel like I have a nice balance between working in the office and being with him at home. And of course we got really lucky with childcare; not only is my aunt someone we trust and who lives near us, but also someone who genuinely loves our son. That definitely eases my “working mom guilt.”

Despite waking up early and tiptoeing around the apartment getting ready, I enjoy coming in to the office. I can focus with little interruption and relish the luxuries that I can’t have at home, like slowly savoring a hot cup of tea. But I also like staying home with him. It can be stressful since I still work from home one of those days, but the household is generally less chaotic since we don’t have to transport him anywhere (and I don’t have to be anywhere at a certain time like the other days). He’s good fun and I’m glad that he spends a majority of his time with his mama.

It’s unfortunate that there’s sometimes a divide between working moms and stay at home moms. After almost two months with this arrangement, I can attest that neither one is easier than the other. Almost every mom out there is doing her best for her family, and we need to support one another and the decisions we make. Because whether we work outside the home or not, at the end of the day, ALL of us are tired from our jobs.

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3 thoughts on “Working mom vs. stay at home mom

  1. What a nice post! I agree that there is sometimes a divide between stay at home and working moms and that’s unfortunate. I love that you admit that you enjoy going to the office – I do too. And frankly, I believe that my children benefit from having me enjoy it.

    • Thanks Tammy! I’ve always felt that a happy mama is what’s most important because of what you’ve said — kids feel that. No point in staying at home if what a mom really wants to do is to work; otherwise she and her kids will be miserable. Vice versa with working; if a mom really wants to stay home but feels pressured to provide financially, it’s possible that what the kids really want is time with mom (assuming this is financially feasible; most households now require two incomes unfortunately!).

  2. Great post…I’m on my last week of maternity leave and scheduled to work on the 17th. I’m still debating if I should use one of my baby bonding weeks or to just jump back into it. I know it’s gonna be rough no matter when I start. Wish we had a cool Tita Dory to watch him, but I don’t want to just leave him an auntie that someone knows. I’d rather shell out the daycare fees. Keep posting…it’s been great reading.

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